December 2009
22 posts
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a 99 bananas fueled reconnaissance mission
my parents never gave me a key to their house but if i got home after curfew i would find a window to climb through. here is a story of such a time, perhaps the worst.
i was perhaps 16 years old. i was at some house party of which i recall there being no cups left when i got there. to remedy such i do believe i used the cookie jar instead. there was 99 Bananas involved. i got...
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barry glibb sucks donkey dick: a story about high...
this one teacher would give me detention ALL the time. he was the new, young MALE economics teacher (in an all girls school. ugh you can imagine the drama.) ”Mr. D” as most girls called him. ”Mr. Douchebag” to me. and yea i probably got a detention for calling him that at some point. this guy had it out for me. i didnt know why but once it was on, it was on. he would make digs at me all...
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evanwalsh: “We’re Going To Be Friends” by The...
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what happens to stale oreos
ya know how oreos get kinda mushy when they get old? ya know, like they lose that crisp cookie-ness? when i was a kid my little brother loved oreos. my mom would buy them all the time for him. when they would get old and he wouldn’t want them anymore, they would magically disappear. wasting food in that house was not something you wanted to get caught doing or you’d be feelin it the next day if ya...
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maeve
i met Maeve because i was her RA and someone had called to complain that she was throwing nuts out the window at people. sure as shit i get up there and she was sitting in the windowsill, throwing nuts out the window. i asked her why and she simply said, “i try to get them into people’s cars through their windows. its quite fun, give it a try.” she extended a bag of nuts. not one to...
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Living Out of a Suitcase in the Trunk of a Car
“take just what you need” she said and i can’t say i knew what that was, but i took a few picks; i made a few choices not sure of what home is, let alone where. five different bras and a week’s worth of underwear. my charger was buried, my toothbrush MIA. the socks don’t match and the deodorant almost run dry. one macbook. two cameras, a bundle of cords, and an iPhone for my pocket. the dogs are...
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Bouncing Souls - East Coast, Fuck You
from my...
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fucking uterus can suck a dick
seriously, this shit feels like it wants to explode. right now my pituitary is doing all sorts of wacko shit, throwing out hormones like its complements from a drunk. then my ovaries are like its side kicks or some crap and they are like “yeah we’re gonna spit out hormones too” because apparently thats what the cool kids do in the human reproductive cycle of a woman. so then...
wedding madness : an upstate weekend tale
thurs evening: the wedding rehersal. at the church i realize the Olympus camera alone will NOT suffice. the lighting in there was that of a cave and my fancy camera was freaking out too much to take decent head-to-toe shots. portraits and large scale were great, but i couldn’t nail the other shots no matter how much i fucked with settings of all sorts. i then almost cry over my dead...
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Why do I automatically assume that anyone who is...
hobart:
robot-heart:
Is it that hard to believe that the cognitively abled could be so happy, too?
i’m always pretty happy. also i bit dumb tho…
and you’re always pretty. ;)
but seriously,
The Plastered Smile Kills Me
i am guilty of thinking the same; i am really creeped out by these people, these mentally unstable, who smile ALL the time. there must be something wrong with...
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$1.75 to wash, $.25/7min to dry
the other night i did my laundry. i hate doing the laundry. i have to lug my piled up dirty clothing and unmentionables a few blocks away from my apartment to a place that is run by some sort of asian family who speak in a dialect that may be beautiful if it werent overwhelmed with all the screaming while the children of the neighborhood run wild, almost confusing the average person that this...
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i need water
and lots of it.
enough to float in.
enough to be vastly alone in.
i just want to float and feel my own weightlessness.
and forget about the pains and headache.
the tangible subconscious.
a nautical escape.
yes.
(originally written 30 May 2009)
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War: Mortality vs. Cost
According to the extensive research of Atul Gawande, there have been magnificent improvements on lethality for our soldiers at war. He states that 42% of the battle wounded of the Revolutionary War died, 30% from WWII, 25% from the Korean War, and 10% from the Iraq & Afghanistan wars. He also reports that surgical patients from the battlefield face only 4 days or less for transport...
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